What I learned:
I picked this up and put it down multiple times. The first page starts with “Life is Difficult”… the same phrase my father loved to remind me of while I was growing up. I guess I was simply not ready to hear what it had to say. However, something kept me going back and when I picked it up for the fourth time, while travelling around Europe after a painful break up, trying to figure out where I was going and what I was doing with my life, I simply couldn’t put it down. I’ve read it a couple of times since and have decided to read it again after writing this blog! There are key principles in the book which I still live by today, both personally and professionally.
The root cause of many mental health issues, stress and inner turmoil is born out of our determination to run away from, bury or deflect pain. However, the irony is that it is only through this pain that we grow mentally, emotionally and physically. Once we understand and accept that pain and problems are a natural part of life, learn to face them and deal with them head on, we liberate ourselves in the most profound way.
Dr. Peck explains that discipline, delayed gratification, taking responsibility and being dedicated to the truth are all practices that enable us to face into and deal with our pain. In doing this we are better able to tackle whatever is causing it in the first place before it becomes too big to manage, manifesting into more painful conditions such as depression for example.
Much like Socrates, Dr. Peck describes the need for continual self-exploration to avoid transferring old patterns of perception into new situations. He states that the process of constant self examination and contemplation is necessary for ultimate survival. We must accept, not avoid challenge.
How it helped me as a leader:
Facing difficult situations and tackling the tough topics head-on has since been a constant focus for me, much to the dismay of myself and others at times! However, it has paved the way for strong relationships both in and out of work of which I’m proud. It has also enabled me to face reality and move forward much quicker than I was able to in the past, hence not wasting time and energy on that which is pointless. Something I’ve found very useful as a leader.
This is something I’m constantly trying to cultivate. I have been known to be quite fixed in my mindset once I believe in something - yes it’s true! The act of continually self examining and growing however has provided me with insight and self awareness like no other! This has led to many of my firmly held beliefs being challenged, hence the need to correct which has been quite painful at times. I now welcome this challenge and anyone who knows me knows I’m always up for a debate. Hopefully I’m getting better at being graceful in my defeats!
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